by Jess Zimmerman. Awl editor Alex Balk found out that farmers have been tinkering with plant genetics to create cross-breeds like “pluerries,” and it inspired him to heights of lyrical brilliance : Please Don't Make The Fruits Do Sex To Each Other The freakish fruits that Science spawns— The pros we know, but not the cons What laws of nature might we breach By blending apricot and peach? Or still more fearsome, contemplate An apple grafted to a date It makes one sit with mouth agape To ponder kiwi mixed with grape You know you need to read the rest of it . It could be the great literary work of our time.

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An ode to scary mutant fruits

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